These Breaking Dawns

A day of doubt
followed by encouragement
to heal the wounds
and fill in the left dents,
the darkest days
need these breaking dawns
to silence the thunder
and calm the storms.
The amazement is palpable
of God's timing
to bring these lights
when the will is dying
but He never lets down
and is always present
even through the storms
we are convinced aren't meant.
The bringing of
the fruit for which
we tirelessly labor
is never the glitch
and always when
we need it most,
the blessing of
the Holy Ghost.

As Text from the Past

You hand me a letter
of what I know it contains.
It is full of heartbreak
and unrequested pain.
It tells of the reasons
and explains the excuses
of why we should run
away from the muses.
It expressed the feelings
in words unworthy
so a face-to-face encounter
full of controversy
won't have to occur
or happen between us,
as the easy way out
is your preference of choices.
You hand me this paper
and stand before me
awaiting my reading
that will not happen quickly.
I put it down
on the ground by my side
with intentions of reading
when the pain no longer resides.
I'll let you walk away
without my knowledge of the contents
where explanations arise
that are nothing but nonsense.
I'll read it in the future
as text from the past
because it's too hard in the present
that came to be too fast.

When the Past Becomes the Present

My fingers are bleeding from feelings untyped.
My mouth is sowed shut with the regret of inaction.
My soul is overwhelmed with unfulfilled promises so hyped.
My body is weak from being part of the different factions.

I thought I had a way chosen
and I thought I had a life to be
but now my knees are weak and will is frozen
and I'm left at the crossroads by she.

With issues so unresolved and love so unreciprocated,
my heart has nothing left to believe in and therefore nothing to give.
Maybe due to my own inactions, this fate was precipitated,
but it doesn't change the fact my insides have no more reason to live.

With knees so weak the body wants to fall,
the legs so disconnected from reality,
my back must lean against the wall
to prevent the floor from gaining a collapsed body.

The finish line so passed
and yet the race so failed,
the memories are trashed
and the dreams are bailed.

So much negativity left in a brain so otherwise drained,
the heart, head, and heels all stop without direction.
The body goes limp with inordinate amounts of pain
as the thoughts of past scars begin their resurrection.

Some may call this a phase or maybe even a bout
but those who have been in the eye of the storm before know better.
The agony that has a hold of my emotions is on a rout
and every part of me, mentally and physically, is again bound by this fetter.